this unquenchable evil learns me few and many ways
to transgress and expiate hence
penance remains a sham in spite of having been paid
-for instance take a number-
once i awoke and got on with my business
when a sudden discomfort grew in my middle
disrupting a wholesome routine and forced me
to lean back for a few years to consider in turn
a series of inevitable perhaps necessary mishaps
which had taken hold of me scoring brazenly
because what had been established was disrupted
not by need it was a hasty and greedy change
of ego’s master game plan and it kept on growing
fashionably and avidly until it exploded a vortex
precisely where things arise
and without further cause or trace of will
i found myself oblivious in a shambles
ruin of a place swamped by the flood
i ran up a flight of decrepit stairs to a trembling
floor
where i laid and tried to rest
and as i looked at the sky
through the great gap on the walls opened to the fire
i saw in a flaring epiphany a score of
disasters
cross the limits of my citadel of psych
and viciously coerce me at gut's level
i tried to order my things but i'm held hostage
having let myself drawn absently
to this mess caging me with the rabble of the earth
so alone and with a promise echoing tall _in short
that every man shall sit under his own three
undisturbed
provided he forsakes his own being and puts to death
whatever nature is rooted in earth
_giving it all away to cosmic hells_ flesh blood
smiles delivered as well
all of which in turn i reject -meanwhile-
i still hear the river flow long and see the sky
lit crimson manmade and then i fix holes
that every parched throat may lie well in the sand
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